DOOMSDAY WEEK: Introduction to the End

 
Brace yourselves, friends...the End of Days is pretty fucking nigh! But, don't worry...we're here to make sure that you, at the very least, have some fun on your way to your maker!

As long as mankind has existed, we have been predicting countless ways that the Earth will cease to exist. It's as if any remotely interesting event coming up (a new millennium, same number dates, the end of a calendar, etc) has prompted the world to collectively breathe a deep breath waiting for something to happen. And, who knows...maybe this time that "something" will happen? Perhaps a meteor is hurtling towards our tiny planet as you read this? Maybe the Earth's core has just about had it? What if the atmosphere is on the cusp of releasing all kinds of powerful hell storms that will wipe out everything? I don't know. I'm not here to predict how we're all going out. I mean, technically, the Mayan calendar already met its conclusion about a year and a half ago....and nothing happened then. So, why 12/21/12, then?

Well, let's go back to the beginning...shall we?

Nostradamus is probably the most talked about name whenever the end of the world is brought up in discussions, even though he technically never predicted the apocalypse...ever. His most well-known book, The Prophecies, is considered the foremost authority on predicting numerous historic events. However, it never once mentions how this world will end.


Nostradamus actually predicted some crazy stuff...like the London fire of 1666. He wrote:
 
"The blood of the just will commit a fault at London,
Burnt through lighting of twenty threes the six:
The ancient lady will fall from her high place,
Several of the same sect will be killed."
 
 
A little fire then blazed through London for three days scorching the entire city. Throughout the years, researches have tied Nostradamus' predictions to 9/11, both Kennedy assassinations, Hitler and Hiroshima...as well as several other historic events. And despite forecasting some of the most well-known landmarks of time, he has never made mention of how our little blue planet will end.

It wasn't the words of Nostradamus that predicted the world's end. It took a bunch of Mexicans to arrive at that conclusion. Mayans, to be exact. Apparently, the Mayan calendar only goes up to December 21, 2012. However, these cocaine-loving Indians didn't believe in leap years and such...so, technically speaking, we should've met our demise a year and a half ago.

Still, the world is full of bad things and bad people. School shootings, hurricanes, atmosphere shifts and wars that go on and on. Perhaps we could use a "reset" button. You can definitely trace the apocalyptic influence in films throughout time. From the early days of movies all the way to today's science fiction blockbusters. So, maybe the Mayans were onto something...despite their drug-induced haze. Regardless, if the world does end this Friday...and fires are blazing across the land...you can bet that I'll be on my front lawn with a beer in my hand watching the fireworks go pop.


Welcome to the End of the World...Deviant-style.


 
Thanks for reading,

bryan.





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